It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
