she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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