It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize