I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
