is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
