Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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