Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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