shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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