Midget sex pt 2 tonight
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Randomize
