you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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