i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
