I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Apparently you make a good broom.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
You're earring is so big in my mouth
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
