I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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