hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
