hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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