My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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