haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Randomize
