and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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