I am spending my child support on dildos
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
