I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Randomize
