So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
