Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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