Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
