That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
