remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
