I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
My sheets look like a crime scene.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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