Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
