Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
