whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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