yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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