girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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