FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
