im gay
i know
yea but for you.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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