Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
