why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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