im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
