Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I party with great urgency now.
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