Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
