She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize