you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
