this boner is exhausting
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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