ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Swine flu. Run for my life!
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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