Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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