We named our party play list daddy issues
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
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