I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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