I'd wear matching sweaters with you
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
