He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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