yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
