we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize