My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
