its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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