I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize